Just when the marketing of cancer feel-good gimmicks cannot get more insulting, there's National Cancer Survivors Day. Oops, I forgot to include that pesky little registered symbol.
My bad, so sad.
Once again, here is an attempt -- through a fake holiday -- to extol those who have "survived" cancer (whatever "survived" means) instead of honoring those who died from cancer or are dying from cancer.
Once again, this huge cloud of denial shrouds our very culture to the core: denial that many, many people are NOT surviving cancer. Denial that money is NOT always being funneled properly into research, but into feel-good campaigns. Denial that people with metastatic disease are NOT being honored or maybe even considered survivors.
They are forgotten. On purpose.
By society's accounts, I am a breast cancer survivor. That's how I introduce myself in social circles because it's a term that most people understand.
However, I'm not comfortable with that word, "survivor," which connotes some sort of superhero who has battled and defeated the demon known as cancer.
"Survivors" are not heroes, but our society puts us up on a pedestal -- all because we have not died from the disease...yet. Those who die from cancer are not weaker or less tenacious than those of us who "survived." Cancer can come back at any time -- and with a vengeance, no matter how hard a person tries to stay healthy.
The problem is that on a subliminal level (or maybe not too subliminal), there's a blame game going on: those who survive did something heroic; those who don't survive just weren't tough enough.
I can tell you how I spent National Cancer Survivors Day yesterday. Irritated that such a day existed and reminded that being a "survivor" is not all it's cracked up to be. We have ongoing medical issues, as a result of harsh treatments. We are at risk for other cancers due to the very treatments designed to help us. We must deal with survivor's guilt, as most of us at least have lost someone to cancer and wonder why we survived. And the experience of having cancer is the experience of losing control of one's life.
"Survivors" can also have PTSD, some of whom must be on psychotropic medication and/or need counseling. Others may have a recurrence, thereby stripping them of "survivor" status.
Truth is, whatever the outcome, nobody affected by cancer is a hero. We are just human beings.
We don't need a Survivors Day.
We need a cure.
I am a professional writer and have published numerous academic and magazine articles, as well as an essay on my breast cancer experience in the anthology Voices of Breast Cancer by LaChance Publishing. To obtain my postings regularly, please subscribe to this blog by clicking the orange subscribe button. I can be contacted at bethlgainer@gmail.com and gainercallingtheshots@gmail.com.
3 weeks ago
